Sunday, February 7, 2010

Savory Spam Crescents

Some of my friends are disgruntled about the ads that pop up on their email accounts, containing words found or implied in their emails (especially the friend who kept getting ads about burial plots.) I find it vaguely unsettling, like having a smarmy guy in a bus station trying to sell me something he thinks I might need because he was eavesdropping on my conversation with a friend. I don't like smarmy guys, and I don't like eavesdroppers. I love Google, and I'm not happy to find it has smarmy relatives.

The notion of privacy is mostly an illusion, but sometimes I like to pretend I have some. I found it impossible do that today when I opened my email spam folder. An ad popped up for "Savory Spam Crescents--bake 12-15 minutes or until golden brown." Spam crescents? Golden brown? Poor, stoopit Google ad-generating program doesn't have a clue about what spam is in its own technological world. Sigh.

But let's not let that deter us from the promised savoryness. Here's your chance to do something with spam besides curse it.

* Exported from MasterCook *
Recipe By :

Serving Size : 16 Preparation Time :0:00Categories : Sandwiches
Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method-------- ------------ -------------------------------- 10 sl Bacon, cut in small pieces 1/4 c Finely chopped onion 1 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed - 12 oz 1 Egg, beaten 3 tb Grated Parmesan cheese 2 tb Chopped fresh parsley 2 tb Dijon-style mustard 1/8 t Pepper 2 pk Refrigerated crescent roll -dough (8 oz)
Heat oven to 375'F. In skillet, cook bacon and onion until bacon is crisp; drain. Stir in remaining ingredients except crescent roll dough. Separate each package of crescent dough into 8 triangles. Spread top half of each triangle with SPAM mixture; roll up. Place on baking sheets. Bake 12-15 minutes or until golden brown

Anyone who actually tries this recipe and then keels over from instantly clogged arteries can't hold me liable. After all, I didn't sneak it into your private email. You opened it yourself!


Anonymous said...

Like your writing,especially your use of words like "smarmy." Howevever, I think I will pass on the artery clogging. I have enough bad habits without adding delicious ones to the mix.

Just wanted to say hi and wish you a good weekend.

Mina said..., the recipe sound kind of yummy to me! :)

Bemused Boomer said...

Yep, yummy. And helps you sleep (in a salt-induced coma.)

I didn't try it. I learned my lesson about Spam last year when it began to proliferate on my store shelf as the recession grew. I remember loving fried Spam and Spam sandwiches as a kid. But then, lots of things that were great as a kid just leave me going, "Huuuh?" today.

Salt and fat aren't my favorite things any more. (Hey, I've evolved!) Best to let memory be the way to enjoy Spam.

Anonymous said...

Hey, what's the deal dissing SPAM?! It's an American institution!! It was developed for our military forces in 1937 as a convenient, nonperishable, protein-rich food. Hell, if it wasn't for SPAM we'd all be goose-stepping to Nazi marching songs!! REAL Americans eat SPAM!! Bring it on!!

FYI, the recipe left out the part about bathing the SPAM-stuffed Crecent rolls in sausage gravy.

Bemused Boomer said...

Alka Seltzer was invented in 1935. Lucky for the WWII GI's!

thom said...

I am NOT bemused... I view these frequent Spam ads / recipes disrupting my emails as annoying and depressing. It forces Americans who are going thru hardships to acknowledge how our economy is under threat of facing a Great Recession. And to think that one of the most successful engines in our economy, Google finds this amusing to post is insulting.

Bemused Boomer said...

Oh, Thom, try not to ascribe anything akin to human understanding to computer-generated drek like the stuff that sneaks into our email. I suspect "Google" doesn't find it amusing. I suspect there is no "Google" as an entity (but if there was, it would definitely be a Spam-eating cretin!)

I just try to remember that Google gives me "free" email in order to sell my "eyeballs" to their advertisers. Avert thine eyes, Thom, and enjoy the part of your screen that holds messages of connection and love and humor from people who care about you!